Learned Manipulation

If someone is a jerk whose problem is that? I get a laugh at my training classes when I flash a slide with this question on it. But really, whose problem is it? People say, “Oh it’s their problem,” but when you’re at home ruining dinner for your family talking about what the jerk did, what is the jerk doing? Having a peaceful dinner with his or her family. The day the jerky behavior becomes a problem for the jerk, he or she will be motivated to change it. But if it bothers you it’s your problem. This answers the question: if they’re a jerk, why am I the one who’s here reading this?

And why are they being a jerk in the first place? Typically the answer to this is because it works. Most ineffective behavior occurs because either it works or be it worked at one point in their lives, became a habit, and now occurs on autopilot.

But it only works when you buy into it. Jack Canfield author of the chicken soup for the soul series used to say if someone told you had green hair with that hurt your feelings? No, because you know you don’t. But if someone says you’re too demanding, might that bother you? Well, if that was a line item on your performance appraisal or something you were accused of in a previous relationship, it may now be an area of insecurity for you, which means it’s a point of weakness that people might capitalize on to be able to manipulate you. Zig Ziglar said if you don’t want people to get your goat, don’t let them know where it’s tied up. But for most of us it’s too late. In fact the people you work with might be more aware of your weak points than you are.

Think back to childhood. What are some of the things children do to try and get their way? Now think about what technique was your favorite. Why did you use that technique? Chances are, it’s because it worked. And once it worked what did you do? Default to that technique? And do you suppose you’ve gotten enough practice and repetition of that technique for it to become a habit on autopilot?

Am I suggesting we are all manipulating one another? Yes. But is it conscious? Not usually.

I believe humans need to be manipulated in order to take action.
What did you do to manipulate yourself to get out of bed this morning?

We will define manipulation as attempting to influence the behavior or emotions of others for your own purposes. With that in mind, think about who might be manipulating you. Who might you unconsciously be manipulating? How does the manipulation show up, and what harm does it do? Are there ways not to fall for the manipulation as well as ways to get your way without manipulating others?

Mapping a Meaningful Journey

We are all on this journey, and we know how it ends. Let’s make it a joyful journey, a meaningful one. When you are going on a trip, you plan for it; you pack, get directions, make reservations. What about life? Are you really on the journey you want to take? To make the journey through life effectively, you’ll need maps—mind maps.

Make a map of your priorities, and base future life decisions on your map. Break down goals or dreams or projects you have planned that require multiple steps using the same mapping technique.

When you find yourself staring into space because you need to write, speak, or organize your thoughts for some purpose—or when you are just worrying—map your thoughts to get them out of your head. Mind mapping is a good technique for taking notes, and in the process you will soon find yourself organizing your thoughts into mental maps, so you can remember and use them.

This mapping technique is used to generate, visualize, structure, and classify ideas, and as an aid in studying, organizing, problem solving, and making decisions. Mapping results in better information retention than by using traditional ‘linear’ thinking and note taking methods.The next section will take you through a series of exercises and instructions to get you started on the road to becoming a master mapper—and achiever.

Integrity: Start with a Circle

So much to do and so little time. Without a plan, we tend to do what comes up, which often means we do what others impose on us. Is that what it’s all about, letting life live us? What are you really all about? Because we can’t do everything and prioritization is the key. Before prioritizing our tasks, we need to identify our priorities in life. Our priorities come from our values. Our values make up who we are. Our integrity comes from living up to who we are.

Are there areas of your life where you are not really putting your time or energy into what you say is important? Are you being true to your integrity? When we live in disharmony with our values, this dissonance causes stress, even illness. Many people say they want to attain life balance, but what do they want to balance? If the answer is work and home, rethink. Is it reasonable to have only these two facets in life? What if something happens at work or in your home life, what’s left? What constitutes the “life” aspect of you?

Map and Master

On a piece of paper, make a small circle and write the word “life” inside the circle. Take about two minutes to brainstorm your life priorities. A good way to figure these out is to ask yourself questions like, “What’s most important to me in the world?” or “What are the main areas of my life?” Popular entries include family, career, health, spirituality, friends, wealth, self, fun, giving back, hobbies, travel, and home.

Draw “spokes” off the circle and write the priorities at the end of the lines. Please avoid making it linear, keep it looking like a child’s picture of the sun. The reason for this format is explained later. It takes about two minutes, so do it now.

Congratulations, what you have now is at least a partial list of your values—the basis of priorities. Only by beginning with what is most important to you can you live life on your terms, what life Naturopath Dr. Rick Brinkman calls a Life by Design. Integrity means being who you say you are, so you still need to do two things: systematically take action in each priority area, and set and protect boundaries. Branch goals off each of the values—things you would like to accomplish in each of the areas.

Stay with the spokes off of a circle technique. This process is called mind mapping, clustering, or spider webbing. You may have been fortunate enough to have a teacher introduce it to you for planning something like a writing project. The reason for this technique is multifold. First, brainstorming from a circle makes you think outward, while lists lead to thinking downward. The circle expands your thinking, listing narrows it. The mental process is quite different; lists are linear while maps are random access.

With a list, you tend to look only at the last entry before adding the next one, so it is easy to go off on a tangent. A map has the main idea or goal in the middle, so you keep focus. Also, maps have no priority order; you can organize after you get all the ideas written down.

Mapping Guidelines

There is more to a map than its shape and format. One of the main purposes of mapping is to allow us to capture all the thoughts and information that comes to us in random order as quickly as it comes. When mapping, it’s helpful to follow these guidelines:

  • Write just a key word or two, not long phrases or sentences
  • Write everything that comes to mind, it is brainstorming
  • Be random, you can organize later
  • Put like things together

The reason for the key words is that memory studies have found that taking notes in full sentences leads the brain to think, “I don’t need to remember that; I’ve got it written down.” Tony Buzan is a great source of information about mind mapping. Buzan has written books, created software, and developed a Web site on mind mapping. While it works to make mind maps of just words and lines, Buzan’s guidelines are specific, and focused on structure and visual variety:

  1. Start in the center with an image of the topic, using at least three colors
  2. Use images, symbols, codes, and dimensions throughout your map
  3. Select key words and print using upper or lower case letters
  4. Each word/image must be alone and sitting on its own line.
  5. The lines must be connected, starting from the central image. Central lines are thicker, organic, and flowing, becoming thinner as they radiate out from the center
  6. Make the lines the same length as the word/image
  7. Use colors—your own code—throughout the mind map
  8. Develop your own personal style of mind mapping
  9. Use emphasis and show associations in your map
  10. Keep the mind map clear by using radial hierarchy, numerical order or outlines to embrace your branches[1]

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Repeat the map and master exercise for work. Write “work” in the middle of the circle, and with spokes around it, identify your job priorities. Off of those priorities, branch goals for each area. Doing this will get you started managing many priorities at once, instead of just doing the ones that are the most obvious.

The Scratch Sheet

In math class, we needed a scratch sheet to figure out complicated problems. In life, when we need to compile, organize, and present complicated ideas and actions, we also need a scratch sheet. The brain can only hold onto seven plus or minus two things at a time. To get things done, mind maps are the perfect multi-purpose tool. After all, where is it easier to organize your thoughts, inside your head (where you can’t see them) or on a sheet of paper sitting in front of you? Try using mind maps as scratch sheets for anything you need to organize. Here are some thoughts on how to apply mind mapping to four common areas of our lives: thinking, writing, note taking, and project management. Remember, it’s okay if it looks like a mess. It’s a scratch sheet.

Thinking

Every time you catch yourself staring into space, you are probably trying to organize multiple thoughts in your head, so start a map. In the middle of the circle, identify the thought process—worry, idea, anger, etc. or the object of thought—person’s name, event, “shopping list,” etc. (or leave the circle blank). Randomly dump out every thought as fast as you can; don’t stop to think, just write. Step back and look for solutions, patterns, and things you could subgroup together. Cluster like things by color coding, numbering, or (if you have mind mapping software) dragging.

Writing, Presenting, and Conversing

Do you ever have to give a presentation, write a document, or initiate a difficult conversation? Do you ever get nervous or have writer’s block? Mind map your way out of  it. Put the topic in the middle of your mind map and brainstorm the main things you have to say or write. Branch off the main topics what you need to say under each of those, then branch off of the subtopics until you have reached the desired level of detail. You map will already be somewhat organized, but consider adding numbers, crossing off unnecessary items, and moving items to subgroups as necessary. This is your outline. Working from this outline, you can put your speech, document, or conversation together quickly and painlessly.

Taking Notes

When a customer, boss, or colleague gives you instructions, is the conversation organized? How long does it take to put these sentences into some kind of action plan? What if you mapped it? Write the name, date, and topic in the middle, then branch according to broad topic. As the speaker skips around, add branches to the applicable topic. For meetings try putting a slash across the middle of the page with the meeting date and topic on it. Starting at the bottom, yes the bottom, write the agenda items in branches off of the slash. As the meeting progresses, add subtopics to the main slashes and more subtopics off of those according to where each comment fits. You can color code or put who said what as well. I learned this technique from the famous Evelyn Wood Reading Dynamics speed-reading program where it is called a slash recall pattern.

At the end of the meeting you can recall who said what without looking. This is because we used key words, not full sentences (your brain says “I’d better remember what these key words mean”) and because a mind map is visual. Look at the map you made earlier, then look upward. Can you picture the map in your mind’s eye? With a little practice, you can “see” the words you wrote on the map and recall all the information. Teach this to anyone in your life who has to study for tests.

Project Management

“Human beings cannot do projects, they can only do tasks,” that’s what my boss told me on the first day of a project management job. “Our job is to break the projects into tasks, so they can get accomplished.”

Can you see how mind mapping could be the best way to do this? Take any goal, dream, or project you have not yet accomplished and write it in a circle, then think, “What steps do I need to take to achieve the goal.” Branch the main steps off of the center, then break the large pieces down, breaking the large sub-tasks down—continuing until the last layer of every branch is a task.

How do you know you’ve reached a task? You know exactly what to do—you have no questions. For example, ff you wanted to write a book and started mapping out the steps but got stuck, that would indicate that you probably don’t know what to do next. In that case, write, “How” (short, keyword entry for “find out how”) on the map, then branch off the ways to research what to do. Perhaps you would come up with, “book,” “group,” and “Internet” as entries (short, keyword entries for “find a book,” “join a group,” and “search the Internet”) Going to a bookstore to get a book on how to write a book is a task.

As a side note, what is a task to one person may be a project to another. I could search the Internet and it would be a task, but if I asked my mother to do it, I would have to explain some steps. Keep this in mind when you give someone a work assignment. If you have been doing the job for a long time, you might not remember that there are steps in the process that must be broken down for someone less experienced.

Once the project has been broken down, it’s easier to decide in what order to perform the tasks, what can be done simultaneously, and what resources you’ll need. Without the map, we just start . . . and stop . . . and realize while we are doing it what the steps are. Rather than work on a project with the steps hidden, get them out and get organized.

So far, we have been mapping. Maps are a great way to conceptualize, strategize, and organize thoughts and information, however, they are not the best format for reviewing the information. Once you’ve mapped a project, it makes sense to convert project breakdowns into to-do lists, Gantt charts, and presentations. You could take the outermost tasks from each branch and enter them manually into your to do lists. However, mind mapping software can almost instantly convert maps into word outlines, task reminders, Gantt charts, and slide presentations .

Converting Your Maps to Master List Life

Keeping things in your head is inefficient. Why? Think about it—or rather—write about it. How many times have you thought something through, only to go back to the idea or solution and find the thought is no longer there? If you don’t ink it when you think it, you can’t use it.

Do you ever feel overwhelmed or lack focus? Imagine opening every program you have in Windows when you turn on the computer. You would run slowly and sluggishly and might crash. It is the same when you try to keep everything in your head. You’ll forget it, be overloaded by it, stress out over it, or keep someone else from getting to it. How many interruptions are caused by people trying to get at things that can only be found in your head?

Why don’t we write things down? Many people say it takes too long, but I am going to purport that it always takes longer not to write things down than it ever takes to write them. As a case in point, consider someone who doesn’t write a to-do list but instead keeps her to-dos in her head. She still has to think at the beginning of the workday,

“What do I need to do today?” If she wrote it down right then, it might take five to ten minutes, but she doesn’t. When she finishes the first task, if she had written her list she could have crossed the first task off and quickly moved to the next (and doesn’t it feel good to cross something off a to-do list). Not having written it down, however, she now has to think again, “What next?” So it goes between each task. By the end of the day, the person who did not write the tasks down spends a lot more time on the unwritten list than would ever have been spent writing it once.

My suggestion is for you to create a master to-do list. Write down everything that comes to mind in chaotic order and then cross off the “junk.” As soon as an item gets a deadline, cross it off and move it to a calendar. Things due today go on today’s to-do list—this is what you work from. Keep an ideas sheet (some day maybe . . .  it would be nice if . . .) where you can keep track of books, movies, restaurants, places, and things you would like to look into. Work with a mobile list to allow you to finish one thing before starting another. Write delegated tasks on an assignment sheet.

At this point people ask, “How many lists do you expect me to have?” My answer is . . . one. Consider having only today’s to-do list and having only the amount of work you can do today on it. While you’re working on today’s list, you will discover projects or tasks due in the future. Write those on future daily lists and get back to today’s list. When you become distracted by things that have no deadline or that you don’t know what to do with, write them on the master list—this is all to help you keep focused on today’s list.

In the choice between keeping work and personal life on the same list and separating them, consider whether you will pay attention to the personal list at all or get carried away on the work. Might it be that having something from your personal life on the list motivates you to work more effectively?

To recap, write to-dos that have a deadline on your calendar and dump everything else on a master list. Break large projects (those with more than ten-steps) down using mind maps. Working backward from the deadline, decide what tasks need to be done month by month, week by week, and day by day to accomplish the project. Put these tasks on the daily lists with color coding. So far, we are better off because our thoughts are organized and out of our heads, and we have only tasks on our list—is there anything else we need to do to tweak our time-management regime?

I Don’t Want Bad Things to Happen to Me

Dr. Stephen Covey in his bestselling book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, suggested a popular way to prioritize is to use a priority matrix. This matrix asks you to assess your tasks according to importance and urgency. Life prompts us to do things that are urgent. If it is urgent, it taps you on the back and tells you to do it. The tendency, then, is to operate in crisis mode, doing the things that are both important and urgent.  

Can you think of some things that it would be important to do, but they have no deadlines? These important things are what would get us ahead of the game, yet most of us tend to only do the urgent. And when we wait for things to become urgent, they often elevate to crises. Crisis always costs more. If I pay my bills late, there’s a late fee. If I do a job at the last minute, quality suffers. You can change the oil in your car now or change the engine later. When we wait until our health or our relationships are in crisis, sometimes the damage can’t even be repaired.

My grandfather continually asked my mother when she was going to have a granddaughter. He died of a heart attack eight months before I was born. My father’s older brother died of a heart attack at the age of forty-seven, and my father at fifty-six also died of a heart attack. If I go on the way we humans tend to, waiting until my health becomes urgent before I do anything about it, I might be next in line. Instead, I choose to proactively take care of my health while it is still not urgent.

On your deathbed, when you look back at your life, what will you wish you had done? Here I am on my deathbed, and I never took that trip to Europe. Here I am on my deathbed, and I’m not sure the people I care about realize how much they have meant to me. Here I am on my deathbed, and all those pictures are still in the box because I never scrapbooked them, so those memories will die with me . . .

Make the journey meaningful. Live life and don’t let life live you. Now it’s back to mind mapping.

Make a Preventive Maintenance Map

Start like before with the word “life” in the middle of a circle. Around the circle map all the major aspects of your life: health, relationships, possessions, finances, work, growth, and happiness. Break each broad category into tangible units: Relationships with whom? What possessions?

Once you have a concrete map of the important areas, items, and aspects of your life, branch off the next layer in a different color. This layer is where you brainstorm what could go wrong in each of these areas. What could go wrong at work, with your house or your car? What could happen with your health or finances or relationships? What could thwart your growth or happiness?

The last layer out, also in a different color, is where you map out what you could do to avoid the bad thing happening in each area. Diet and exercise choices (get specific) that could preserve health and avoid things like diabetes and cardiovascular disease, failsafe measures to shore up finances, preventive maintenance on possessions, quality time in relationships.

Just making the map will get you into a more proactive mindset, but I recommend you look it over and prioritize potential problems in the order they are likely to happen. Do something every month from your map to avert crisis and take control.

Joy and Accomplishment in the Journey

When embarking on a journey, it makes sense to know how much time we have  for the journey by figuring out our plannable hours. A map will let us plan our way instead of wandering aimlessly. Prioritization is our compass. Know and be who you are by mapping according to your values. Stay focused by making scratch sheets of thoughts, ideas, and projects. Stay efficient by writing everything down. Life is a journey; we all know how it ends. Don’t let bad things happen to you.


What’s the New Fairy Tale?

Over the holidays, I enjoy streaming the Hallmark Channel in the background as I cook, wrap, and catch up on work. The movies are addictive and full of festive spirit, but they all follow one of the old fashioned otherworldly story lines:

-A Scrooge gets won over for the holidays by interacting with a true believer

-Characters have forgotten the real meaning of life getting too wrapped up in work until they come to their senses and realize nothing is more important than love and family

-Coupled with the wrong people, the leads realize they are unhappy trying to be someone they are not when they run into the “right” match

-Having been hurt in the past, one person is afraid to be vulnerable when the other player gets them to take a chance on love

When I saw a scene of women vying to get the good luck charm that predicted who would marry next, I realized these themes were probably outdated because we haven’t identified new myths to take their place.

Do we have to choose between work and family? Can you be dedicated to your career and also enjoy a great romantic relationship? Are people destined to be labeled as optimists or realists? Can we have it all? Is aspiring to have it all part of the problem?

I wonder if I have felt guilty and unfulfilled trying to live up to a fairy tale. What is the new ideal? Are we ready to let pipe dreams catch up with reality? Please share your thoughts.

 

Make “Shift” Happen!

.At age 3, I noticed the letters on the steering column spelled PRNDL, and pointed out to my dad that it was our last name. It seemed appropriate, because I have always been so driven.

With boundless energy and an adventurous spirit, I set out to seek my fortune, living in Japan and Russia and learning languages and cultures. The topic that has always fascinated me the most, though, is working with human nature – what makes us tick? Where do our quirks and unproductive behaviors come from? Can people really change and how?

My programs offer more than just information, entertainment, and engagement. By embodying the material and revving up the attendees with insights, ah-has, and a clear road to results, my intention is to facilitate implementation.

Every talk and training I deliver comes with a “Transmission System” for shifting thought into action.

Caring is Rescuing?

I was at what Landmark Worldwide calls the Advanced Course staying in Chicago. The big theme of this course is “Everybody Gets It.” They are referring to the transformation you experience in the Landmark Forum isn’t complete until EVERYBODY gets it.

They break us into groups to do activities and hold one another accountable. At one point I announced to the group that, “I just don’t really care about people.” I began to offer proof of how little I actually care about people when a tough Russian guy in our group looked me in the eye and said, “I think it’s the opposite.” I stat stunned for a moment, then teared up at having been found out by both him and myself. All the concern I felt for everyone that I had been hiding and denying started coming out. Everything felt different. The caring version of me experienced things vividly, mindfully, and gently. I was tempted on multiple occasions to slip back into uncaring where it was safe and easy. I could barely do anything without wanting to cry. I asked how I was supposed to teach my seminars like this, and the group leader suggested I could be the “Crying Trainer.”

As I suspected, it was impractical to go about life exposed and sensitive, so I climbed back into my shell.
The reason I haven’t married or had kids is also the opposite of what I say it is. In reality, I care so much and feel responsible for someone I care about to such an extreme that I will subjugate myself in exchange for their well-being all the time. I feel guilty doing what I want and feel like I have to cater to them 24/7. I play the martyr and then resent them for my sacrifice. I am then angry and surly, pushing away the very people I care so much about, leading them not to like me so I can then escape – or at least that’s the idea. It never really works that way.

It’s like somehow it is my responsibility to make sure everyone else is always okay. And if they aren’t, I am to make them happy in whatever way I can. I know this goes against the laws of human nature, but I have these inclinations and feel I constantly need to be the superhero.

As a trainer and coach, I have to fight these inclinations. You can’t do someone else’s push-ups for them. And sheltering people from their own lessons renders them helpless in the end. Perhaps tough love is tougher on the mentor than on the client.

Where are you letting people off the hook in your life and work? What might be the payoff for you?

A Great Deal?


The women in my family have a tendency to shop to earn their keep. I mean the feeling is that if I buy stuff on sale, I’ve almost made money, which would be true if it was actually stuff we would have needed to buy anyway, but … you know what I’m getting at.

Well, the grocery store up the street was going out of business, and everything was half price. It was day four of the sale, so things were pretty picked over. I did find a few things I would have bought anyway down the first three aisles I perused, but I was being careful not to get too much – even at half price.

I heard some chatter in the next aisle, and the manager came by me and said, “Did you hear? You can fill up that cart for $25. We want all of you to help us empty out this place, so we can close today.”

I hurried back to the aisle where I had passed on the expensive coffees and grabbed four varieties. I headed to the Isle where the protein packs of nuts had almost made it to my cart. I grabbed some dark chocolate. Then I headed for the jerky and the juice. I took every pouch of tuna they had and every can of southwest corn (I make this corn dip about 10 times a year, and it requires 4 cans at a time).

I commented to a young woman who was waiting in front of me to get through the aisle that I was impressed at how civilized everyone was being.

The frozen food aisle brought fruit, smart ones dinners, and ice cream. I paid $29.28 and headed into the parking lot with a heaping cart. A man outside offered to help me unload it so he could use my cart. His name was John, and I ended up giving him some of the coffee.

I had filled up my whole back seat, and wasn’t sure what I would do with all the groceries. I called my friend, Autumn, to see if she wanted some of it. I still had to fill a trunk with canned goods. I had several things to do today, but this ended up being a big production that took up three hours.

Now I feel like I have to hurry and eat it all up to get rid of it. Despite all the groceries I bought, there wasn’t really anything to eat for dinner – except for frozen dinners and ice cream.

I guess I’ll give myself credit for having earned $375 today, since I bought about $400 of groceries for $25.

The Hash House Harriers

I just started running with the Hash House Harriers – A Drinking Club with a Running Problem. I “hashed” a little when I lived in Moscow, and it kind of reminded me of Toastmasters for people who like to get together, get active outdoors, and do some drinking.Moscow H3

Someone called the “hare” lays a trail in advance of the group’s arrival. There is a “chalk talk” where the hare explains the markings he or she left along the trail. There are always some situations where there are dead ends and unusual routes through various obstacles and “checks.” They also have beer stops and shots along the route where everyone waits for all the walkers to catch up before proceeding. Those who run ahead indicate what they are finding in the markings by hollering and whistling. It is usually just through normal city streets, so we make our marks with flour and toilet paper. Like a lot of old-school clubs, there is a lot of tradition and ritual. You wear long socks, H3 shirts, and often hats. Everyone also has a homemade necklace made out of beaded tiles that contain your “Hash Name.” You have to hash for awhile before you get a name. I had been called “Sampler” when I hashed in Russia, so I made my own beaded necklace with S-A-M-P-L-E-R dangling from it and the obligatory whistle.

Every hash ends with a “circle” where various people are called out and reviled with various insulting, dirty, or party-themed songs. They have tens of songs where they’ve altered the lyrics to be dirty or about drinking and hashing. The hare is always the first person brought into the circle. We all tell them how much the trail they laid sucked, singing a song to that effect.

You get called out for finishing in front or in back, for having a special occasion or not hashing for a while or not wearing hash gear. Then there are accusations where hashers point out (Hashers point with their elbows) things others have done that cause them to deserve being singled out.

Then at the end, they ask anyone who has not been brought into the circle for anything to come in and pay penance for that. Each separate group brought into the circle gets a song sung to them and then is asked to “Drink it down, down, down . . .” Old rules were that you had to drink all of whatever you brought into the circle or pour what was left over your head. Now you can just hold the drink over your head when you’re done.

I really like the long, strenuous walks in diverse areas outside. I also like drinking beer and hanging out with lots of people. It is good to be a part of something.

Tough Love

My Tough Love Confession

Every coach I have had has let me off the hook even when I asked them to be very tough on me. Tough love is not about being tough on the person, it is the ultimate way to care about a person . . . by being tough on their “inner stuff,” the hardware of our brains that fights change and holds us back.

Get Certified as a Life and Executive Coach Online This Year

The Professional Coach Academy’s Certified Professional Coach Course Outline
Understanding What Coaching is and What Coaches Do
What coaching is and why it is so powerful
What coaches do exactly and where to draw the line with other modalities
Most “coaches” are not really coaching, so what is a good coach?
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What clients are actually buying and how to make sure they know you delivered it

Coaching Techniques and Practices (Hands-on)
The initial coaching conversation
Building trust, rapport, and cooperation with clients
The first coaching session
Helping clients discover what they want and be motivated to get it
Using questions to help clients shift perspective and make discoveries
Identifying and clearing blocks and repeated behavior patterns
Subconscious Reprogramming
The second and subsequent coaching sessions
Helping clients create accomplishable plans and holding them accountable to follow through

Logistics and Business Configuration
Setting up your practice: choices and recommendations
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Branding yourself based on your purpose and your target niche
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Continuing education modules on marketing and coaching
90-Minute one-on-one “Coach Incubator” session
Private Facebook group for collaboration and support

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What is Your Brick Wall?

What is it, that thing that keeps coming back that you don’t seem able to escape? Is it a habit, emotional control issue, fear, lack of confidence, communication problem, motivational block, or something else?

What if our quirks, hang-ups, and issues are just a byproduct of our subconscious survival mechanism – the remains of a childhood experience that imprinted us? And what if by identifying this childhood wound and cultivating new habits of thought and action we could overcome them?